Idealistic
by Jin-Chan16
Summary: What if Akihiko loved Misaki first? What if Hiro-san loved Nowaki before he loved him? And what if Miyagi never married for three years? I OWN NOTHING
1. Romantist Introduction

It had been a month or so since their parent's funeral, Takashi Takahiro and his younger brother stayed at their parents home since the funeral. The stress of taking care of his younger brother and maintaining a part time job had him tired, exhausted by the time he hit the pillow. Being only eighteen, everything seemed so surreal, one moment his parents were there, supporting him and taking care of Misaki, and the next they're in two caskets, being lowered into the ground. A tear slipped down his face, before it could fall from his cheek he had wiped it away, there was no time for tears now.

Bills were scattered around him, covering the table, late notices, demands for rent, all of it was overwhelming, the constant demands of the world outside his home seemed unrealistic. He knew better though, this was reality, and he needed to get everything together soon, he didn't want to get kicked out because he was too stressed to simply send in some money. If it was for his brother, then he'd send his entire paycheck if had to, anything to keep his brother with him.

"Nii-chan," He turned to see Misaki at the kitchen doorway, wearing his light blue teddy bear pajamas and a stuffed bear with a stripped ribbon on it. "I can't sleep nii-chan,"

Takahiro smiled and hurried to his brother, scooping him into his arms so that he could cradle the little boy against his chest. Thin arms wrapped around his neck, and short legs wrapped around his waist, a mess of chocolate brown hair was buried under his chin. As he was getting ready to tuck Misaki back into bed, several sharp knocks made him freeze, he looked at the clock; almost ten thirty at night. His blood went cold, who would be there so late at night? Assuming the worst, he put his little brother down, telling him to go wait in the kitchen for him, being only eight, he nodded and did as he was told.

Several knocks echoed through the small apartment as Takahiro made his way, slowly, to the door. He looked through the small hole in the door, relief washed over him in waves. He opened the door without further hesitation. "Usami-san," he said, smiling brightly, never had he been so happy to see his best friend, "what are you doing here this late?"

"You haven't been answering your phone, I got worried," He said, adjusting his glasses. "You haven't been at school either, so I couldn't talk to you there. Have you been sick or something,"

"Nii-chan," The small, sleepy voice came from behind Takahiro, they both looked down and saw the little boy rubbing the sleep from his eye, "what's going on?"

"Nothing, Misaki, go back to your room and I'll be there to tuck you in in just a moment," Takahiro gave his brother a warm motherly smile, without complaint, Misaki retreated back to his room, dragging his teddy bear behind him. Takahiro looked back at his friend who remained passive of any emotion.

"So he's the reason you haven't been in school?" He asked bluntly, "I thought I told you to tell me when you needed help, I could send over a nanny to watch him while you work or go to school,"

"I don't want him brought up by nannies, Usami-san, I want him to know that no matter what happens I'll be there for him. If I let other people raise him, then he'll think I don't want him around, I don't want him to think there's no one he can rely on. I'm sorry, but I can't do that, and I dropped out of school a week ago so I could work more, so don't blame him for it." There was a firmness in his voice that made his friend stop questioning him, a sternness that made him more of a man than anything.

"Then let me take care of him," The offer threw Takahiro off, never would he think his friend would offer something like babysitting. Surely he was joking, with his sadistic humor it wouldn't surprise him in the least.

"It's alright, I've got everything under control," He said, trying to give a smile to prove so, he flinched when he felt the constant jabbing of a finger to his head.

"And that's why you look like shit," The bluntness should have been expected, "I'll take him to my apartment for a few days, the kid's on break right?" without waiting for invitation, Usami-san let himself in, pushing past his friend.

"U-Usami-san!" He exclaimed, following the man to his younger brother's room, "it's fine, really!"

"You have work tomorrow don't you, do you plan on taking him to work with you?" The silvery haired man, went through drawers, opening and closing them and pulling out a few clothes, little Misaki sat in his bed, a bit frightened by the man who had stormed in and began going through is things. He held his bear close when cold lavender eyes had their sights on him, "You should get a bag so for your stuff," fearful of the man, Misaki grabbed an old backpack from his closet, bringing it over to the man, before said man could take it, Takahiro had snatched it away.

"He's not going, thank you for your offer but he doesn't need to go anywhere," Never had his brother's voice been so demanding, so forceful, the other man he had heard been called Usami-san, seemed to only make things worse.

"Two days, he can live without you for two days," the icy response sent chills up his spine, he looked at his brother who looked a bit hurt from the cold answer. Without waiting for his answer, Usami-san took the backpack and shoved the clothes inside before picking up the little boy who yelped in surprise. "I'll see you then,"

Misaki looked over the man's broad shoulder, watching his brother's sad expression as he left, he waved bye as the door was closed, he hoped his brother saw. He was carried down stairs to the parking lot, the dim street lights were the only thing that made it able to see, he was placed in the passengers side of a bright red car, he thought he had seen one just like it in a car magazine somewhere. He was buckled in and given his bag, his bear still close to his chest when Usami-san had gotten in on the other side and buckled himself in.

"Where are we going," He asked meekly, the last thing he wanted to do was anger the man who had taken him against his brother's will.

"My apartment," was his simple reply. Misaki looked down, already he missed his brother, he wanted his brother with him so that he knew he would be able to sleep soundly. Tears had already built in his eyes, spilling over, he pulled his bear closer so that the man wouldn't see him cry. He couldn't stop the small, but audible whimper that escaped from the back of his throat, the car came to a sudden but smooth stop, he guessed they had come to a stop light. He jumped when he felt the buckle slide off of him, he only looks up when large hands pull him over onto Usami-san's lap. One arm wrapped around him, and the other on the steering wheel, the hum of the engine and the rhythmic beating of the man's heart against his chest where his lullaby that night, he quickly slipped into a peaceful sleep by the time they were half way to the apartment.

Usami-san parked the car in the garage that was connected to the building of his apartment, he unbuckled himself and slipped out of the car with Misaki and the bear and backpack in arms. He carried the little boy up to his apartment, struggling to find his keys and keep Misaki from falling out of his grip, after a few minutes he successfully made it inside without dropping a thing. It was only then that he realized that there wasn't a bed for little Misaki to sleep on, he thought about it for a moment, the guest room was filled with toys so there wasn't a bed for him to sleep on with all the plastic toys that were scattered on it, not including all the fan mail and gifts that he had also stocked in there.

The other room was his office, so obviously that wouldn't work, the next option was his room, not as many plastic toys and it was rather big so it'd be perfect. He laid the backpack on the couch, and carried the child up to his room, stepping over toys and a train set, when he reached the bed he gingerly tucked Misaki under the covers. He removed his coat and scarf and laid them on the dresser, he stripped himself of his slacks and shoes and put on a pair of pajama pants and a thin long sleeve shirt before he joined Misaki under the warm covers. Just as sleep had pulled him in, he felt something small, but rather warm snuggle up to his chest, cracking open an eye he found a mess of soft tendrils of brown hair against his chest, smiling he wrapped an arm around the tiny body, pulling the warmth closer.


	2. I'll Love You

The next morning came sooner than Akihiko would have ever liked, though the room was dark he could still feel the small warmth curled up right beside him, a tiny fist holding tightly to his night shirt, a mess of brown hair laying contently on his chest. He didn't move for a while, afraid to disrupt the child's peaceful sleep, but it was only when he felt a small wet spot on his shirt did he slowly inch his way out from under the tiny body, putting a pillow to replace his chest underneath the boy's small head. Quickly, that same boy snuggled deep into the pillow, sleeping just as contently as he had been on that firm chest, Akihiko sighed in relief and carefully slipped out of the room without making as much as a small creak. He headed to the kitchen where fresh hot coffee awaited him, steaming inside a black handled glass pot, he pulled out his favourite bear cup and filled it almost the brim and grabbing three sugar cubes from a small ceramic bowl next to the coffee pot. Plopping the three cubes in he stirred lightly with a small spoon, playing with them as they dissolved into the steaming black liquid.

Just as he was about to take a sip of his coffee, a small, slurred voice stopped him, "Usagi-san," he turned and saw a small bed headed brunette clutching his teddy bear in one hand, and sluggishly rubbing the sleep with his eye with the other, "I'm kinda hungry,"

Usami-san was a respected man of wealth and talent, unfortunately in this situation, wealth and talent wouldn't help him feed an eight year old breakfast. He felt a bit obtuse as to what to say to the little boy, pondering about what he could give him for breakfast, or something relative to it. Putting down his coffee, of course not without taking a quick sip, he rummaged through the cabinets, looking through without much success of finding anything. He looked back at little Misaki who sat patiently at the table, swinging his feet while looking admiring the view of the city from the window, an idea struck him, making him hurriedly grab the phone from the receiver and practically stab the numbers into the phone before listening to it ring.

"_Hello_," Misaki couldn't hear the voice very clearly but it was obviously female.

"Aikawa, I need you to do me a favor...yes the manuscript is done. Then you can do my favor on your way...just pick up some breakfast...doesn't matter to-er wait a sec," Aikihiko turned to the little boy who turned a light shade of pink from under the man's firm gaze, "Do you have anything in mind that you would want for breakfast?" his blush turned darker, afraid to speak, he simply shook his head no and watched as the silver haired man went back to his conversation. "It doesn't matter, just hurry," he said, hanging up.

"Who's Aikawa?" Misaki asked, playing with the hem of his shirt, his face still the same shade of red. Akihiko took his his seat next to the small eight year old, taking a sip of coffee before speaking.

"My editor, I write stories and she makes sure that they're good," He stated simply, the little boy looked at him with a little more eased expression than before.

"Is she your girlfriend?" The question immediately threw the young author off, he would have choked on his coffee had he not already swallowed it, he stared at Misaki in bewilderment. How would an eight year old have any idea of what a girlfriend was?

"No...No just my editor," He said taking a quick sip of coffee, "how would you know what a girlfriend is anyway, aren't you kids supposed to be focused on studies," Misaki huffed, folding his thin arms over his chest.

"I know what a girlfriend is, Nii-chan always brings his over whenever he thinks I'm asleep." The eyes of the youngest Usami were like dinner plates, his face turning a faint hint of blue. "It's really gross cause Nii-chan makes all kinds of noises till she leaves."

Unfortunately for our favorite author who lay unconscious on the floor, face blue, his coffee was already beginning to get cold on the table. Misaki squealed and hurried over to the unconscious man and shook him as hard as he could, trying to get him to wake up before his editor arrived.

It was another five minutes before the young woman walked in, her vibrant red hair in a neat bun and her white blouse and maroon skirt made her seem professional and beautiful. Unfortunately for her, neither male noticed when she walked in with large plastic bag in one hand and her brownish tan messenger bag in the other. Hearing the little boy near her crying author and friend, made her drop both of the bags and run to her unconscious co worker.

"Usami-san!" She quickly ran to her friend and checked his pulse, normal, his color was coming back, slowly but surely. She sighed in relief but then remembered her initial purpose for coming, she looked around and didn't see the manuscript that she was promised, gripping the sides of the man's shirt she picked up his entire upper body and shook him violently, completely unaware of the small boy hiding under the table. "Wake up you bastard! I need my manuscript before the deadline! You promised!"

For several minutes of manhandling the author she gave up, letting him drop to the ground with a dull thud huffing several curses under her breath as she dusted herself off. A small whimper made her look down, seeing a small foot under the table, she bent down and saw the little eight year old hiding, his face going pale when she spotted him.

"Oh," was all the pretty editor could say, was this the reason she had to make a breakfast call so early? She smiled warmly, making Misaki calm down immediately, "hello,"

"H-Hi," Before he could introduce himself, the woman was on her feet again, rushing over to the large plastic bag and pulling out a Styrofoam box and then coming back over to him. She held out the box that smelt warm and sweet, his stomach growled loudly, she giggled lightly and held it out further urging him to take it.

"It's just some French Toast but it should be pretty good," Looking at her and then at the delicious smelling box, he hesitantly took it from her well manicured hands.

"Th-Thank you," He replied shyly, he almost jumped when she gushed loudly.

"So cute~" you could practically see the fan girl hearts glittering in her eyes, "so where did you come from? Usami-san has never told me about a cutie like you before,"

Misaki opened the box and had already started nibbling on the sweet toast, "I'm Takahiro's little brother," he replied, for a moment her face dropped but she quickly recovered.

"Aikawa," the author murmured, half awake on the floor, "what the hell are you doing here," the crude answer was replied with a harsh punch to the temple.

"Where's my manuscript!" She demanded immediately, again taking hold of the young author's shirt. Unfazed, either by the haze of unconsciousness or knowing that this was coming, he pointed upstairs to his office. In a flash of red, she was gone already in his office, the youngest Usami carefully sat up rubbing his aching head gingerly, he found his little guest still sitting under the table, already starting on another piece of toast.

"Misaki," The green eyed boy looked up at him, a little bit on syrup on the side of his face and half a mouthful of toast made him seem utterly adorable. Quickly he composed himself, clearing his throat, "are you thirsty?" he asked, getting on his feet. It didn't take long for Misaki to follow him out from under the table, setting his breakfast on the table and sitting back down properly he nodded.

"Can I have some milk?" He asked as he continued to nibble on his syrup dipped toast, without thinking twice, the older male was in the kitchen getting some milk from the fridge. Just as a small glass was set in front of him, Aikawa was downstairs, flipping through several pages of several thick stacks she carried in her arms.

"Sensei, I think this is the best yet," She beamed happily, practically skipping down the stairs, her high heels making light clacking noises as they hit the stairs.

"That's what you always say," He muttered under his breath as he picked up his fallen chair and sat down, sipping his now lukewarm coffee, "don't you have to be at the office or something," he said rudely.

"Usagi-san!" Misaki snapped, "be nice to your guest," Aikawa had to resist the urge to laugh, it was funny how an eight year old seemed more mature than her sensei. Akihiko gave the boy an odd look, grumbling something about respecting elders.

"Actually, I do have to go, I'll see you late Misaki-chan," She said, slinging her purse over her shoulder and waving goodbye, "Behave sensei," the door closed before he could snap at her.

"Tch, she acts as though I'm not a grown man," He growled, getting up to refill his coffee, "at least she brought breakfast,"

Misaki looked down, spinning his toast in the thick syrup idly, "Hey, Usagi-san,"

"Yes,"

"Are you sure Aikawa-chan isn't your girlfriend," The young author sighed in frustration.

"Yes, I'm positive that banshee isn't my girlfriend," He grabbed the newspaper from the kitchen counter before taking his seat at the table.

"Then who loves you?" The question was innocent, curious, but it stung. Akihiko placed his coffee on the table, he starred at it for a while before answering.

"No one, I don't need anyone to love me," Why wouldn't he want to love him? Everyone wants someone to be there for them, to care for them from time to time, to love them. So why didn't Usagi-san?

"They can't be true," Misaki said, "everyone has someone right? I mean, I have my Nii-chan, and Nii-chan has me and his girlfriend. So, surely...surely you have someone too...maybe you just don't know it," This kid was definitely odd, that or very naive.

"Maybe," Was his subtle answer, an idea went through the eight year old's mind, an extraordinary idea. He left his breakfast where it was as he got up, and stood beside his temporary caretaker, looking up at him with determined emerald eyes.

"Well...then if you don't think anyone does...then...then I'll love you," A light blush spread itself on his cheeks, his face nothing but seriousness or as much as a little boy could muster. Violet eyes went wide, looking down at the youth in wonder, how could someone so young even fathom the idea of love?

His eyes softened, oh well, someone loved him even if they didn't know the true meaning behind it someone did, he extended his hand and ruffled light chocolate colored tresses, "Alright, then I'll love you too,"

* * *

Well...good, bad, better, worse, tell me.


	3. Will You Wait For Me?

Eight years had passed since then, going from baby fat and playgrounds Misaki had ripened into lean muscle and study halls, though he had changed drastically shooting up a good foot and a half and his hair growing out just a bit longer, he was still his Usagi-san's Misaki.

But today was Saturday, Usagi-san's favorite day of the week only because his Misaki would always make something new and bring it over for him to try, the night would later progress into watching scary movies which would later result in cuddling when the teen would become scared and cling to him for dear life to keep the monsters or axe murderers away. It was four o'clock now, which meant in thirty minutes on the dot his Misaki would come in with a plate or a large pot and a warm smile, in his mind; the best weekend ever. He smiled at the thought, and inwardly gushed, these weekends had become a regular occurrence no matter how much work he had, no matter how behind on his deadlines he was, Misaki always made him relax and put his nerves at ease.

He lit a cigarette, taking in a deep breath and exhaling silvery smoke into the air, he knew he had to get it over with before his Misaki came, otherwise he'd have to deal with his wrath and have his addictive cancer sticks flushed down the toilet again. His brow ticked at the memory...never ever ever again...

As if on cue, the clicking sound of the lock and the twist of the doorknob made the young Usami rush to the sink, taking a quick drag before turning on cold water and the garbage disposal, "Usagi-san,"

Trying not to look too guilty, he turned around and leaned against the counter, the water still going when Misaki's large plate was set on the table. He looked at Usagi-san oddly as he came into the kitchen, "why's the water turned on?" he asked as he turned it off, he stopped for a moment, staring down into the sink. Seeing this look, Akihiko took the chance to retreat to the table.

"What did you make today? It smells really good," a harsh tug to his shirt almost made him trip, he looked back to see his Misaki holding the soggy cigarette with his thumb and index finger, giving the older male a disapproving look.

"I thought you said you were going to quit," He said coolly.

"I am, when I'm dead," was his witty reply that received a harsh smack to the back of Usagi-san's head. He rubbed the forming not, half scowling at the teen who was glaring at him angrily.

"That's _not_ funny," He said coldly, hurt tinted his angry green eyes that tempted to burn holes through his head. Sighing, the author simply patted his Misaki's head affectionately, giving him a comforting smile.

"Don't worry, I'm not dying anytime soon," He missed the mixed emotions that ran through those emerald eyes, the fear, the pain, the relief, the love, "come on, let's eat before dinner gets cold," his guest only nodded and followed him to the table.

"I made Onigiri and some sushi, I also got some rice together and I can make some miso soup if we need some," He said, peeling the aluminum foil back to reveal it's delights.

"It looks good, what's in the Onigiri?" Usagi-san asked as he got two plates and bowls from the cabinet, placing them on the table as Misaki got cups and chopsticks.

"Salmon, the sushi is crab," He replied, "what do you want to drink?"

"I think there's some Sprite in the fridge," Usagi-san had already begun to fill his bowl with rice and his plate with sushi and Onigiri. Misaki came back with two cold green cans, he gave one to the author and then sat himself down, looking at the remains of dinner, frowning some.

"Couldn't you have left me just a little more," he grumbled, getting whatever he could which amounted to one of the three Onigiri and five out of the twelve crab sushi's, "I should probably make more next time,"

"Here," Half of an Onigiri plopped on his plate, some of salmon coming out and the seaweed had begun to fold off of the rice, but when he looked back Usagi-san had already begun to eat his half of it, not saying a word as he ate.

After they were done eating and dishes had been cleaned and put away, Misaki had pulled out a movie from his backpack showing it proudly to the young Usami, "It looks good doesn't it? I mean I got a really good deal off of it too. And Sumi-senpai told me that it was a really good movie and it had an amazing quality and-"

"What's Paranormal Activity?" He asked, taking the DVD from the teen's hand, "It looks stupid," he said bluntly, giving it back to the offended brunette who stood gawking at the taller male.

"How can you say that! You haven't even seen it and you're already criticizing it! What the hell!" He exclaimed, throwing his arms up in exasperation, "Can we at least watch it before you say anything?"

"It looks stupid because it's obviously a horror film and after we watch it you'll freak out about it and come crawling in my bed, begging me to make all those ghosts away because god forbid we watch something normal that doesn't give you a goddamn nightmare!"

"I never see you complaining when I get in your bed! In fact your a bit inviting whenever I get in, is that just with me or are you the same way with any boy who will get into your bed," Suddenly the world was upside down and the back of his head was throbbing. His vision was a mixture of silver and purple, his breath was caught in his throat or at least that's how it felt when he found he couldn't breath through his mouth; it took him a good minute to realize that he was on the floor, Usagi-san on top of him his lips sealed over his own. For a moment they were still, a thought went through his mind in that moment, a thought that scared him to death.

When they separated, Misaki was speechless his mouth partially open as air made it's way back into his lungs, he watched as the young author's face went from smug to horrified in a matter of seconds, in those seconds the same author had jumped off of him, holding a hand to his mouth. But the teen didn't move, he remained on the floor, sprawled out like he had fallen staring at the ceiling as his brain registered what had happened.

"M...Misaki...I-I'm so sorry...I...don't know..." Guilt washed over the older man in waves when he saw that the boy was still on the floor, he rushed back over and knelt beside him, cradling the teen against him, "I'm so...so sorry,"

He had been kissed. Usami Akihiko had kissed him, Takashi Misaki.

While Usagi-san was still murmuring apologies and holding the boy as tight as he could against his chest, Misaki had managed to sit up properly and back away just enough so that he could see the other's face. Before his actions could be questioned, he had kissed the man this time, wrapping his arms around the author's neck and straddling his lap, holding him in place as he let his hormones temporarily take control over him as he tangled his fingers into soft fine silvery hair. When he pulled away, his eyes glazed with lust and a passion that he at the time couldn't explain, he was slightly out of breath and his face flushed, Usagi-san just looked up at him in something he couldn't describe either. What he did know at the time, was that those large cold hands that ran up his shirt and to his back and held him in place, they felt like they were melting against his warm skin.

That same terrifying thought went through his mind once again.

"Usagi-san," His lips were captured again, the kiss more passionate, more heated than before, sent him spiraling into so many emotions and hormones. Soon, they were on the couch, Misaki, in the heat of it all had lost his shirt and was working on removing Usagi-san's, button by button. Before long, with twisted limps, and sweaty bodies, both were partially bare, bare chests to chests, lips to lips, the cycle didn't change or waver at all, it was only when a cold hand had drifted down to regions that had been untouched, as that hand had begun to slip into the confines of his pants. A smaller hand had covered that colder one, green eyes avoided the violet gaze that would have him melting, suddenly those swollen lips seemed so dry his throat as well.

"What's wrong," The question could mean so many things, the answer could mean much more. In his adolescence, he had never been in this situation before, he had often imagined it and how certain and ready he would be when the time came, now that it was here he didn't know if he was as certain as he had imagined. Many _what if_'s entered his mind, they sent fear through his body, doubts into his mind.

"Not yet," He murmured, he looked up into those violet nonjudgmental eyes, he felt safe in their gaze, "I...can't...not yet..."

That cold hand had left those regions and come to his face, caressing his cheek so lovingly, he brought his own hand to cover it as he melted into the other's palm. Akihiko leaned down and pressed his lips against the teen's forehead before resting his own against the warmth of his skin, their noses brushing together, their lips ghosting over one another.

"Will you wait for me?" The question itself seemed so pathetic, he knew the man wasn't a virgin, he knew that there was no way that he would hold his needs for however long a teenage boy wanted to hold onto something he found so stupidly-

"Of course I will," Usagi-san whispered back, kissing him again.

And again, that horrifying thought passed through him.

_I could die like this_.

* * *

So, reviews make chapters come quicker, see how fast I got this one up even though it's probably shit, just tell me what you think and if it needs improvement or if you like it and you want me to hurry up and update.

Love you guys, and please review.


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